I want a part-time job, with a full-time salary.
I want coffee, without the stank breath.
I want to be a hipster mom, without giving up my Jewish motherly roots.
I want everyone to eat their vegetables, without having to bribe them.
I want fresh flowers that never die.
I want to be crafty but not have to DIY.
I want a kiss from my 16 month old, without the biting.
I want to work with grown-ups but spend time with babies.
I want my kids to shoo me away at school drop-off, but hug me like I’m their whole world at pick-up.
I want chocolate that makes me lose weight.
I want my son to love his mommy, without being a mama’s boy.
I want my daughter to love to dance, without the pressure to be any good.
I want my kids to learn by doing, without having to do much more than play.
I want a night out with my husband, and be home by 8.
I want to be productive, with time for daydreaming.
I want to drink less Diet Coke, without having to drink less Diet Coke.
I want to wear black without showcasing all the baby bodily byproducts on my sleeves.
I want to be a PTA mom without the baking prerequisite.
I want to show my support without always having to show up.
I want to be fit without having to get up at 4:30 in the morning to work out.
I want to hear “Mama!” without the trill of desperation.
I want to sleep more, without missing anything.
I want to finish my to-do list but still feel purposeful.
I want to watch Star Wars with my kids but withhold all the crappy TV.
I want to come off like I know what I’m doing, but not like I know it all.
I want more children but I don’t want to spend less time with the ones I already have.
I want to spend more time with my kids, but I also want to be alone.
I want to be alone, but only for about 2 hours at a time.
I want 2 more hours with my husband, after the kids are in bed, that don’t involve dish-washing, lunch-packing, bill-paying or arguing.
I want to make the argument that I can work less, without feeling like I’ll lose part of my identity.
I want to be a role model without being perfect.
I want to know what you think about having it both ways.